The Herald, The Edge: Clontarf, and I – Week 3

3 Feb


The Herald, The Edge: Clontarf, and I



Friday 27th Jan – 10 stone 1lbs or 64 kilos

Body fat from 20% to 19.5%


Week Three


Training Day nine:

Friday 27th Jan. Andrew. The newbie in the Edge. Only in Ireland would a personal trainer, a man who punishes you to within an inch of your life, who can be cold and cruel while inflicting pure torture on your very soul, only he would request I don’t refer to him as Andy. His mother would kill him!

Another circuit of lunges, presses, and Burpees but also included are excruciatingly frustrating hanging chin-ups. This is where you are hooshed up to hang by hand, head above the bar, for 30 endless seconds. I will never again criticize tennis pro’s and their squeals on the court. My unintentional roars of frustration were a source of great amusement in The Edge.

Also included in this pain fest was my old friend nausea. It eventually passes but there are several minutes, during and after, when breakfast says hello again.

Very tough indeed!


Training Day ten:

Sunday 29th Jan. Alex. I approached my weekly Sunday boxing class with a slight swagger feeling confident that I knew what lay ahead and although it would hurt, I would see improvement. We started strong and I was beginning to feel invincible with my pounding uppercut and swift left hook.

Then Alex decides to break me.

On one end there’s a giant elastic band wrapped around my mid-riff, on the other end is Alex pinning my feet to the floor. Then come the crunches. Fighting against a thick rubber band, a personal trainer and gravity, he successfully made a monkey out of me!

Despite the vitriol with which I describe the boxing class, it is an incredible workout and the time actually flies by.

I am ashamed to admit it but, somewhere, deep in the pits of my inner sado-masochist, I actually enjoy it…


Training Day eleven:

Monday 30th Jan. Michelle. My first girl-on-girl action. Warning to any men or women who are going to The Edge – Do Not Be Fooled By Her Pretty Face. This woman is as unforgiving and brutal as any personal trainer, male or female.

A small part of me wants to kick her little ass for being so young and gorgeous, but I reckon she would take me in a fight!

Our session was tough and included the usual no excuses, no short cuts but a few laughs.


Training day twelve:

Wednesday 1st Feb. David. Spring is here! I felt it in my step too and for the first time, did not feel like complete death at the end. I managed to get closer to successfully completing a chin-up than ever, albeit with the help of another oversized elastic band (and a helping hand), but it felt like the real thing. Turns out Muesli was a mistake so I won’t be eating that yummy breakfast again – at least not until I am in the maintenance phase. Hard work as ever but invigorating!



As this is the halfway point,  I feel it’s appropriate to explain some of the science behind this method of getting fit.

David has furnished me with some info about the behavior of the body and areas that are targeted during training. The Trainer’s are not interested in making a woman skinny and boney; they are about strength, conditioning and health, and personally I would prefer to have a lean, defined body than a skinny rickety frame.

Saying goodbye to wobbly bits and being firm and toned is a great feeling, and for me, the physical strength is empowering.

The Reason behind the weekly Body Fat Analysis:

The next time you find yourself crying on your kitchen floor because you dropped the sugar bowl, or screeching like a banshee because your partner left the milk out. Ask yourself first, what time of the month is it, and second, what is it about your period that makes you psychotic?

The Edge creates a hormonal profile for all clients (yes, men are included) as they respect and understand the effect of hormonal fluxes on all round health and well-being.

So, in a very simplified breakdown, the reason my hip is pinched with a caliper is to measure the insulin levels in my body. If my muscles are full of insulin, it turns to fat in that area.

The fat on your back indicates your tolerance to carbohydrates (if you don’t want back-boobs, you must PUT-THE-BREAD-AWAY!)

If it’s your stomach, believe it or not it has a lot to do with stress and sleep. A good night’s sleep does wonders for your bodily functions and will aid weight loss. That’s my favorite part. More sleep = better body!

Basically, the philosophy at The Edge centers on an all over lifestyle choice. There is no point in eating junk food and training like a maniac. There is also no point in starving yourself and getting no exercise. It’s a balance that is actually quite easily achieved.

My particular program, like all in The Edge, is designed to suit my capabilities and it is altered as I become stronger and leaner.

Put it this way. This week I lost another lb, I lost another % body fat and I gained a Kilo in muscle mass. In 3 weeks I have lost 7lbs but if we take into account the body fat % loss, the weight loss (on the scales) and the muscle mass increase, I have actually lost the equivalent of closer to 1 stone!

And I feel great!


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